He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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