Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
