Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
