I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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