this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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