Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
