i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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