pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
