Pregnant stripper...not hot.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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