It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
