Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
