I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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