we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Randomize
