He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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