I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
