So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
