Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
