Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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