Non-Jews are for practice
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
