I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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