Well apparently he's into motor boating.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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