dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
