I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
