Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
