weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
