What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
