so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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