Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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