I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
