I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
