i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
