You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
