This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
You ruined the universe
Randomize
