With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You've changed since you got that strap on
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize