I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
