i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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