How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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