Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
