everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
No subtext here. People are naked.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
