Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Randomize