Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I intend to get homeless drunk
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
