You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
i think i just lost a toe
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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