You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
