dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize