Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
