So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
