when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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