I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
