using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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