I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
